The Assholosphere

“The Assholosphere” is located somewhere in between a private joke and a private reality, so if some dear reader by chance has blundered into this post, the keyword is “private”, and you most likely will have no understanding or appreciation of what lies ahead, so you can stop reading now (I hate to waste peoples’ time).

“Reid”: said in an email: “I think we need to dump to blogosphere and initiate the assholosphere.”

Assholes will understand his reference. To any “dear readers” from the outside world who are still reading and wasting their time, despite my warning, Assholes are former denizens of mindspring.general. They know who they are, and other Assholes know who they are. I always felt there was a Conrad quote that kind of got to it:
“These were strong, lusty, red-eyed devils, that swayed and drove men – men, I tell you. But as I stood on this hillside, I foresaw that in blinding sunshine of that land I would become acquainted with a flabby, pretending, weak-eyed devil of a rapacious and pitiless folly” Sounds like Assholes to me.

For those of us out here in the giant corporate ISP world, there is no more mindspring.general. And that’s a pity. Or maybe a blessing, depending on your pov. I said it back when I started noticing the way things were going. “Someday we’ll pay giant faceless utilities for our internet connections”, as I sit typing unbelievably connected to a cable tv ISP. It’s unbelievable because there was a time when they couldn’t even get tv right, yet here I sit.

At any rate, enough of this crap. I have links to three Asshole blogs over on the left. It used to be called “Friends’ Weblogs” but it’s probably more accurate to call it the Assholosphere.

Which brings me to the present. Some of you Assholes are missing. Tommy, Wally, Walt, Chief Broom. Chief Broom!! Damn you! You started this whole thing and yet I sit here patiently, still waiting to here where the hell your blog is. And Wally? What the f…!! I don’t care if you turn it into a Bush shrine. You damn well should be up here! Walt, Tommy, c’mon you turkeys, get listed. Usenet is history. The Blogosphere is boring and way too self-important. These days, we desperately need an Assholosphere. Here we are dispersed around corporate ISPs twiddling our thumbs. Remember the old days when we used to bludgeon and insult one another? Such fond memories. I call you out. Get a damned blog. Go to Google and get a free one. Domains are cheap. I found a nice stupid one, you can too! The last time I looked, was available. But is taken. But seriously, I wouldn’t go there. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.